To all the children born in December: sorry. I don’t know what we were thinking in March (well, actually I do). As a parent of a December child, I know that you are the greatest Christmas gift your parents will ever get. I also know that you get the shaft in presents and celebration every year.

It is not that we don’t adore you with every atom of our being. It is just that time shrinks to the size of a pea in December. There is never enough of it as we rush from parties to stores, from baking cookies to decorating trees.

My December child has solved this problem by declaring the entire month as cause for celebration of her birth. She calls it Suzmakah. The rules of Suzmakah are simple:

  1. Work “Happy Suzmakah” into as many sentences as you can during the season.
  2. Give out many, many hugs during Suzmakah. You get extra points.
  3. Be generous. Additional presents will not be turned down. Never think one gift will do double duty as both Christmas present and birthday gift. That just isn’t fair.
  4. Join all calls for Suzmakah celebration at the local pub (and there tend to be quite a few). Drinks are on you.
  5. Finally, if you hire a plane to write your birthday wishes in the sky, please spell Suzmakah right.

To my own December child: I will never forget taking you home from the hospital in a giant red Christmas stocking. You couldn’t wipe the smile off my face with a snow shovel. And here’s another silver lining—you have the biggest stocking hung by the chimney with care. Forever.

Happy Suzmakah, baby.


If you have a December baby or just want to start your own holiday, give me a shout. Leave a comment please.

For a short story in the tradition of National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation, check out “Christmas Unplugged.” And have a happy and well-lit holiday.